Tales from Bear

There are things that turn your life upside down, and seem catastrophic at the time, and then there are real crises that you sometimes miss because you are too wrapped up in your own bit of drama. A friend of mine, whom I have know since public school, just lost her father. It's something so foreign to me, at our age, especially since my parents are 20 years older than hers. I hope it is not too late to help her through what must be a difficult time, even though she likely needed a shoulder over the past couple months and i was completely absent.

Being back at work feels good, I feel like i've re-entered the 'world' again. I didn't realize how much my life is structured around the rhythm of work, lunch, afterwork, between work (weekend)....being away for a few weeks was kinda like floating endlessly. Even though my time was free to spend as I please it was almost as though I was reluctant to 'ruin' the beauty of that true freedom by booking an appt or making concrete plans with friends. Now I can't wait to 'fill up my calendar' with exciting occurances, though when I do, I long for my free time!

Headed off to a funeral for a friend's mother today, in this case it was mostly for the best, she had a very reduced quality of life for the last few years. I knew her before her mind was stolen from her, a delightful woman who always tended a bountiful garden and greeted you with a smile. Sad, though, to think our friend will be without his mom, this is something I certainly can't imagine, and hope not to have to encounter for many years yet... thank goodness, my parents are both in good health. I have to remember not to take this for granted.

I did it, I accepted a new job doing something similar as before at a different Hospital. I'm excited that there will be no more interviews - that is definately a horrible way to spend time - I really forgot how much I loathe the whole hiring process. In the end it really is just a crap shoot for the employee and the company - everything can look wonderful on paper or at first glance. I am a little nervous, and a lot excited...getting back to the opportunity to make a difference.. This time round I have a little more incentive, a desire to prove to myself and others that I do have what it takes to be a memorable and successful piece of the puzzle. I want to know that I will not be a fading flower again, if I leave a place I would like to be something others aspire to be like, make my own mark, not struggle to fill oversized shoes.. this newly created position should provided this. It's also looking like the boat may be ready for a 'maiden' voyage this long weekend...w...